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The Center Of
South America <
Once upon a time...no,no,no, that does not work. How about, in a jungle far far away..., no, that sounds too fairytale-ish. How about I just tell you who I am. I am Kanye a talking spider monkey form Africa, but somehow I ended up in South America, Mon. So let me start the story, it is about two siblings from Washington DC name Mohwa and Kim. Hello, Mon? New paragraph start! MON!
Mohwa and Kim were a WONDERFUL duo. Kim was #1 on FBI's most wanted, while Mohwa was stuck being her brother. One day, Kim decided to get away for a little...how do you say..."vacation," mon. So since Kim was a convict, she stole Air Force 1 from the President of the United States!
"Come on Mohwa!" yelled Kim, "Get in the Plane!"
"Kim..." Mohwa whined, "I don't wanna..."
"GET IN THE PLANE!" Kim screamed.
"But..." Mohwa said tiredly.
Yes, yes, Mohwa and Kim's relationship had it's little bumps, mon. But soon... begun the jungle adventure has, Mon!
"Kim! I can't see out the window!"
"Mohwa...that's because it's closed."
"Oh. Well excuse me!" Mohwa opened the window, "I fixed it!"
"Woah! This plane has everything! Look! It even has a built in Pizza Hut Pizza Maker!" Kim yelled.
"Well get to cooking!" Mohwa replied.
5 minutes later the pizza bell dinged. An automatic voice came on and said, "Your pizza is ready, Mr. President. Mr. President, your pizza is done, Mr. President." It repeated over and over while the Presidential song played until Kim yelled, "SHUT UP!" and then hit it with a frying pan. Kim then opened the oven. There was a warm, fresh, sizzling pepperoni pizza just waiting there to be gobbled up in indulgence.
"Mmmm...smells good," Mohwa sniffed and said, "I'll have 6!"
"Mohwa! That's more than half the pizza!" Kim said in exasperation.
"Hey, it's not like you need more than two! It wouldn't be good for your 'diet.' I mean, do you really want to risk it?"
Kim gasped as Mohwa took his six slices, he even took a seventh!
"You can make yourself
another pizza. I want the last piece too," Mohwa reached for the slice.
"Mohwa! NO!" Kim yelled as they started tackling for the pizza, "NO! IT'S MINE!"
Suddenly, they heard a sudden beep and another voice said, "Evacuate the plane, Mr. President! Evacuate! Mr. President, EVACUATE!"
Kim's arm had hit the emergency button and the plane started plummeting downward.
"AHH!!!" they both screamed.
"The plane is plummeting down, Mr. President," the automated voice said.
"WE KNOW THAT!" Kim yelled.
"Would you like to know your location, Mr. President?" the voice replied.
"What does it matter? We're going to die anyway!" Kim screamed as she grasped Mohwa tighter.
"Okay! Your lasagna will be out soon!" the voice said.
"WHAT! WA-wait! I didn't say tha-"
"Your lasagna is ready, Mr. President," just then a lasagna popped out of the side of the plane.
"Ooh! Lasagna!" Mohwa sniffed and said,
"MOHWA! WE ARE PLUMMETING DOWN TO WHO-KNOWS- WHAT! THIS IS NOT THE TIME FOR LASAGNA!"
BOOM! CRASH! CRUMBLE! DING!
The plane had crashed, Mon.
"You have crashed successfully!" the voice said.
"One more peep out of you and you'll be turned into a calculator, buddy!" Kim angrily expressed.
Yes, yes, I know what you're thinking, "What the banana peels is Mohwa there for? He doesn't do anything!" Well, my friend, YOU ARE WRONG! You will see how Mohwa helps the one called Kim!
"Would you like to know your location?" the plane voice said.
"Fine if it will shut you up," Kim said.
"You have landed in South America, near the Amazon, but not completely. Further details will be available soon," the voice spoke.
"Woah, we're far from home," Mohwa said.
Kim sighed and rubbed her neck, "This is NOT going to look good on my criminal records!"
Mohwa looked up with a questioning look on his face.
"Hey, you don't know what it's like to be me!" Kim replied to the look.
“Calculations of your exact location have been decided. You have landed on the Forest Floor."
"Forest Floor, huh? Weird, in geography, we learned a whole lesson on this area," Mohwa remembered.
Then YOU could guide us!" Kim said in excitement.
"Yea! I think I remember something about a waterfall over there that has food nearby! The only food we could get was in the plane, and it shut down," Mohwa explained.
"Well, let's go! Which direction?" Kim questioned.
"South-west. Just follow me," Mohwa replied.
"OK..." Kim nervously said.
Yes, Mon. Their adventure is just starting... and they have NO idea...
"Um...this doesn't look like a waterfall..." Kim said as they stood in front of a bunch of vines and what looked to be a swamp.
"You have to go through the vines!"
"Well...okay...but you come with me," Kim told Mohwa as they went through the vines together.
"A plane! We're saved!" Mohwa shouted in excitement.
"That doesn't sound like a plane..." Kim said as she turned around slowly, "A swarm of... FLIES!!!" she screamed.
Oh, Mon, they were in a mess. Suddenly, the flies surrounded Kim and Mohwa and began to do their icky fly-like things.
"EW! Ewww!!!! Get them off!" Mohwa shouted.
HALT! Let me stop here, friends. This is where it gets good. So let me continue to narrate.
Just as all hope was lost, the handsome spider monkey, also known as Kanye, jumped to the rescue! I...I mean the handsome spider monkey flew through the air and gobbled up those flies.
"Woah...cool monkey!" Mohwa exclaimed.
"Spider monkey to be exact, mon," I replied.
"Y-yo-you can talk," Kim stammered.
"Yes and so can you. Oh, oh, right, I am a monkey. You see, my owner, Master Whoshi, enchanted me so that I may speak. We have been watching you from afar," I explained.
"Okay...yea that doesn't sound like a stalker at all!" Kim replied to me.
Mohwa bumped Kim on the shoulder, "Kim... be nice to the monkey!"
Kim sighed and glared at him.
"I have been sent to help you," I explained, "Come with me, I shall take you to Master Whoshi on the top of Tall Mountain. But it grows dark, first we must catch some rest. Do you have a place to stay? Or something to sleep on?"
"Nope and nope," Mohwa sighed. But suddenly, a packet dropped out of his pocket, and out burst a raft. "Hmmm...must have fallen in my pocket when the plane was falling."
"That is perfect," I told them, "Bring your raft as a bed, I have a place for you to stay, the Forest Canopy. Come along now, no time to waste."
So I guided them to the Forest Canopy were they settled in and lied on their raft-bed. This was our first night together. Little did they know that there would be many more. Master Whoshi sent me here to help them become something. Something great and heroic...
"Eee! Ooo! Aaah!" I yelled.
"Huh...what, huh?" Mohwa said very tiredly.
"The early monkey picks the bananas!" I told them my favorite saying.
"That makes no sense at all," Kim tiredly spoke to me.
"You know, you never told us your name," Mohwa questioned.
"Oh, yes, yes, I suppose I should tell you. My name is Kanye."
"Oh yea! Like Kanye West?" Mohwa questioned about his favorite singer.
"Huh? What? Who? No, no, no. No "west," just Kanye the spider monkey," I explained to the confused Mohwa, "Enough about me! We must start on our journey to the great Master Whoshi. In order to do that, we must scale that mountain," I pointed to the mountain known as Tall Mountain with my tail.
"Wow that's big," Kim gasped.
"Well, let's get a move on! Master Whoshi does not like it when his guests are late!" I urged them.
We got to Tall Mountain and I gave Mohwa and Kim some scaling equipment.
"Well, good luck!" I said as I waved them off.
"Aren't you coming, Kanye?" Kim asked me.
"Silly friend," I replied, "Master Whoshi did not only give me the power to speak, he gave me the power to fly!" I said this as I got up and flew away to the top of
"Well that was odd," Mohwa said very puzzled.
"Yea, really! Well, um, let's start climbing! We don't want to be late for Master Hula!" Kim said.
"Whoshi!" Mohwa corrected her.
"Whatever just climb!"
So Kim and Mohwa set off on their climb up the mountain. But little did they know there was a creature up ahead, a big creature...
"Yes! We made it!" Mohwa jumped for joy as he climbed up onto the flat ground with Kim."
"GRAWWR! WRZZ! RAWG!"
"Wha-what was...that?" Kim nervously said.
Kim and Mohwa quickly turned around, it was a crocodile.
"Quick! Hit it on the head with something!" Kim screamed.
"Uh....OKAY!" Mohwa quickly chucked his binoculars at the crocodile's head.
"HAGRRRARRR! GRAWR! RAWW---BZZT!"
The crocodile fell to the ground. Kim and Mohwa heard clapping. "Good show, my friends, good show!" I told them.
"Okay, what's going on here?" Kim asked me, "Did YOU do this?"
"Me? Oh, no, no!" I started to explain, "Master Whoshi probably sent this task out."
"WHY?" Kim annoyingly said.
"Well, I don't know for sure but let's go meet him. His secret dojo is on the edge of this mountain. It overlooks the Amazon River," I told them as we started to walk to the dojo.
"Ummm...I don't see a dojo," Mohwa said.
"Of course not! Watch this," I pulled out my special bag from my pocket. I took some powder from it and blew it. Suddenly, Master Whoshi's secret dojo had appeared. "Chop, chop! Let's go in!" I help open the door for my astonished human friends.
"Welcome, my friends!" a frail, old, floating man said.
"This is Master Whoshi," I told them.
"Indeed. I have been watching your ways, my friends, you are the one's I've been looking for."
"Again, not like a stalker AT ALL!" Kim said sarcastically.
"Let's start with Mohwa and Kim's training, shall we, Kanye? Mohwa! After you are done with me, you will become a computer programmer! And Kim, you will become a pilot! Or at least a better one!" Master Whoshi said.
"SWEET!" Mohwa yelled.
"Mohwa, come with me, and learn the art of computer programming. Kim, you will go with Kanye. But we will all train at the Amazon River. WALA WALA BANG DOODLE BOO!
Suddenly, we all appeared at the Amazon River. Kim came with me and I taught her the art of piloting and how to actually stay IN the pilot's seat, while Mohwa went with Master Whoshi to learn the programming of the computers. Ah, yes, yes, Mohwa was a very fast learner and much smarter than you might think, mon...
"Okay, so I connect red to blue?"
"Yes! You have it!"
"And the Internet plug is..."
"Right, right! Okay! Now, I just configure the web cam filter and Firewall and ..."
"It's programmed!" Master Whoshi exclaimed.
Kim's training was done already. She got frustrated, but she knew enough to get her by.
"Now Mohwa, see if you can insert this new lime green wire into the general slot ‘a’."
"Hmmm... okay...weird, it feels squishy."
Kim turned around, "That's because its a SNAKE!!!"
"I can handle this!" I yelled, "Jungle Force 3, assemble!"
Suddenly, my two friends, Chita and Masquita arrived. Chita was a toucan, while Masquita was a tiny mosquito.
"Attack!" I yelled.
All at once, we all three pounced on the boa that started to squeeze Mohwa. The boa, after a long, hard fight, fell to the ground. "Thank you, Jungle Force!" I told Chita and Masquita as they flew away.
"I think they are ready, Kanye, WALA WALA BANGO DOODLEY BOOP!"
We all appeared back in the dojo. I was standing beside Master Whoshi as he said, "You have done well, my friends. Your new mission, to survive in a new jungle home."
Mohwa whined, "Please! I don't want to survive in a new jungle home! I want to go home!"
"OR!" Master Whoshi interrupted, "Mohwa can fix the plane's computer and Kim can take us back to Washington DC with you!"
"We choose number 2!" Kim yelled, "Let's go home!"
So Mohwa fixed the plane's computer configurations and got it up and running, even the pizza maker! And Kim SAFELY took us to Washington DC. I write this now from Mohwa's desk at his house. He is at school right now. I better go, but it is truly a jungle adventure we will NEVER forget!
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